Retracing Salford

This exhibition at Salford Museum and Art Gallery documents over 50 years of Salford’s recent history. The exhibition includes

• Photographer Maria Murphy’s view of regeneration in Salford
• Mixed-media artist Tim Garner’s collages of photography & painting
• Lawrence Cassidy’s family photographs, films and memories from residents of demolished Salford streets.

I spoke to Maria Murphy as she reminisced about growing up in Broughton in the 1960s. She said, “We used to have play streets, the road used to be closed so kids could go out and play in the streets. But you go there now and it’s hard to find anyone on the street at all.”

The regeneration projects of the 60s, including the flagship flats at Hanover Court, had become eyesores by the time they were demolished in 2005. Through the 70s and 80s the housing deteriorated in structure and remained under-funded for refurbishment. They were recently condemned for providing substandard living conditions to Salfordians.

It throws a spotlight on the hotly-contested local redevelopment that Salford City Council is undertaking; the regeneration flats at Chimney Pot Park; “affordable housing” way out of the reach of local residents and the Council’s habit of ploughing money into short-sighted housing renewal projects.

The exhibition runs until 20^th April, entry free.

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Manchester Freebies II

Krispy Kreme's Trafford Centre launch has resulted in the one thing obese Britons really don't need: free doughnuts. However, taste one of these little beauties and you'll see why Chris Rock said:

"Krispy Kreme Donuts are so good, if I told you it had crack in it, you would be like, "I knew it was something in there. These donuts are too good. Got me going there at 4 o'clock in the morning going, "Come on, man, open up. Let me have at least one donut. I'll do anything. I'll suck your dick!" That should be the new slogan. Krispy Kreme: So good, you'll suck a dick."



Anyway - to the freebies. The setup of Krispy Kreme at the Trafford Centre is a coffee shop and doughnut-making facility on site. Approximately every half an hour, the staff give away free doughnuts as a fresh batch comes through.

Enjoy. But not too much.

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Woodstock: Given the Didsbury Treatment

Usually, the refurbishment of your local pub is a traumatic time for any self-respecting regular.

They change the comically peeling wallpaper, get rid of the shove-ha'penny board and replace it with a student-friendly quiz machine, and bin that pre-PC female contraceptive machine from the loos.

The Woodstock on Barlow Moor road was already a "done-up" pub, having had a refurb back in 2003. It had already received the clean wooden floors and random assortment of high-backed chairs treatment.

The big beer garden with smoking area was also a big pre-fit up bonus. They served the cultured but wallet-destroying Belgian 8.5%er, Duvel. But it had no centre, no character. Being so big, and going for the warm and cosy feel, it felt like a hotel. You could also grow a sizeable beard in the time the food took to get from kitchen to table, even if you were the only customer.

But in come the decorators again. And they're a bit trendy. Gone is the large outdoor signage. Out goes the strangely curved wall which sliced the main room in half, in come chandeliers,
expensive mismatched chairs, gold ceilings and dressed down bar staff.

It sounds weird. But - without showing that I watch a lot of home decorating shows - the lighting from chandeliers on the dark walls is warming without being overwhelming.

Now it's more sympathetic, there are more nooks and crannies to squirrel yourself away in. And the bar staff are friendly and chatty. Although it's disconcerting being served by a guy who looks like Kevin Smith's shorter, northern brother (with ponytail! and shorts!).

The only problem decor-wise comes where the kitsch-y feel leans over into trash. The extreme clash between gothic rails and random pink furniture. The leopardskin lampshade. Descending the stairs to the loos is an interesting experience, as you're accompanied by bold rose wallpaper and red LEDs. It feels a bit naughty, like you're descending the stairs into an Amsterdam "private shop".

It's a matter of taste. And unless you take yourself a bit too seriously, you probably won't find it offensive.


The food's gone a bit more adventurous, with Galric and Lentil burgers, a chorizo, olives & cheese combo with peppers and sundried tomatoes, which was lush (although it was served with that favourite of tautologies "rustic bread".)

It wasn't overpriced, we had one and it didn't last long.


Taking care of their darker-lunged patrons, there's a well-constructed heating "shelter" for the smokers, more mismatched chairs and a bit o' nice planting outside.

The pub's set in a very pretty plot of proper grass anyway, the garden's great - in fact it's only decent one between here and town; there's The Didsbury, but there, you're basically sitting right on Wilmslow Road.

The Woodstock ticks all the right boxes for a local pub. Good beer. Nice Food. Good people. Sense of humour. But it'll retain a lot more charm if you're on a quiet afternoon in the garden, rather than wedged underneath a leopardskin furnishing on a rammed Saturday night.

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Global Warning

M20's poshest takeaway is Globe on Lapwing Lane, Didsbury.

It USP is that purports to offer a fine dining experience in the normal takeaway format; serving up not ony Italian but Mexican, Indian, Thai, Japanese and Chinese dishes. They call it "fusion food".

There are over 80 exotic choices, from the Sui Mai - Chinese pork dumplings with bamboo - to Thai Geang Keow Curry, to the Yasi Yakitori (seasoned aubergines, shiitake mushrooms and peppers).

Ambition is certainly not a problem. But with such a sprawling menu, can they get the food out in time, in the right order? Can we have a restaurant quality meal in our own homes?

The short answer? No.

Here's a tip for you. If you ever need free beer, call up Globe, order something elaborate, and for every 5 minutes that they're late with your delivery, call back, and in your finest parental voice, pretend not to be angry, but just disappointed at the failings of this supposedly upmarket and bespoke service.

Works every time.

Joking and theiving aside, what's the quality of the food actually like? Is this Pimp My Takeaway, a flashier, louder and more expensive version of reality?

I can say that the pizzas, like this 'Globe Around The World' to the right, are fantastic. Packed with sweet and crunchy red onions, peppers, olives and capers, and layer upon layer of pepperoni, and chicken, this is the closest Globe really gets to a fine dining experience.


The upmarket starters, however are often disappointing. Check out this Har Kau - steamed dumplings, minced prawn, finely chopped bamboo shoots and soy sauce. Apparently it's ok to charge £3.90 for this:The dumplings were more rubbery than a Goodyear's finest tyres. The portion size was ridiculously small. This is just not acceptable for "fusion food".

So, in conclusion, if you desperately need a proscuitto and rocket pizza, Globe is the place to go. If you can survive with ham and pineapple, there are a million other takeaways within a 2 mile radius.

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